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Their goal: to separate you from your bank account.
While the bureau acknowledges that virtually everyone is at risk, it says Internet scammers pay particular attention to “women over 40 who are divorced, widowed, and/or disabled.” These cyber-criminals create elaborate profiles on singles sites, often with glamorous photos.
Men are often accused of focusing exclusively on the physical, but I soon realized there are plenty of women who do the same.
This explains why several ladies in northern Wisconsin sent inquiries despite my stated intent to remain within metro Chicago for dating.
Her response caught me completely off-guard: “You’re a really nice guy, but as a larger woman, I need a larger man.” While “larger” is always open to interpretation, from my perspective, she in no way fit the general definition of the term. She self-identified as such and envisioned herself with a man of more Falstaffian proportions, which I lack. Some of my cyberdates went nowhere, but a few women became trusted friends and confidants.
I’m no longer active on dating sites, but I don’t regret using them.
But I wasn’t the same single guy I was the last time I lived here. And I wanted to meet people, so I turned to Internet dating as a way to meet eligible women.
Over the course of several months of online dating, I discovered that the pool of available older women is vast and diverse (as is true of men, although perhaps to a lesser extent) and that with a little effort, a reasonably intelligent, halfway-presentable person can usually generate some interest on dating websites. We’ve survived death and divorce, raised families, managed careers and built support networks of family and friends.
Take it from someone whose new “friend” ran up the bar tab while keeping her purse hidden all night: Start with coffee. The sad fact is that some people are just looking for an excuse to go out with especially a naïve chump who will pick up the bill. Case in point: After connecting online and hitting it off over an extended phone conversation, I met a woman for a happy-hour drink.
She was an attractive redhead with a sparkling personality and a great smile.
Don’t claim to be a gourmet cook when you can barely boil water.
Don’t portray yourself as someone you’re not, because sooner or later your date will get a peek behind the curtain. If the good vibes are mutual, you’ll be scheduling another get together soon, anyway. Many among us have a hardwired set of beliefs regarding how we appear to the outside world and what our ideal mate should look like, and we are disinclined to stray from our preconceived notions.
And even though procreation is off the table, I picked up clear signals from the women I met online that the meter is running, so it’s best to get on with things.