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25-Mar-2020 12:30 by 4 Comments

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The social context of being at church, for example, demands radically different behavior than being at a nightclub.

This is someone who’s demonstrating poor social calibration; he’s getting a very obvious brush-off and keeps trying’s ok to approach women is to consider the social context of the situation.At any given time, there are generally accepted rules that define what behavior is considered acceptable and appropriate for the situation.You’re incongruent with the location and that can be incredibly creepy to people; it tells others that you either don’t understand the rules that govern what is and isn’t acceptable or you don’t .Someone who doesn’t care that it’s not appropriate to yank a book out of somebody’s hands or pull the earbuds out of her ears is sending the signal that they may well not worry about little things like “consent” either.There’s that constant feeling that you’re just one misplaced emoji away from being exiled to the Island of Unfuckable Boys, there to live out your life in monklike celibacy, forever mourning your stillborn love life.

In reality, it’s not quite as complicated or difficult to attempt to approach women is automatically creepy.They hear the various horror stories about guys being labeled as creepy for trying to hit on women at cons or approaching women they see on the bus or on the train or trying to slide into their DMs and then lament that there are no acceptable ways for men to hit on women any more.Almost every time a woman shares a story about just trying to get through their commute or catch up on their reading during their lunch hour, there’s a host of men complaining about how this isn’t fair to their dicks.One of the hard and fast rules of dating and not being creepy is recognizing that everybody has boundaries and those boundaries are flexible; some people have greater levels of access to us than others because we have different levels of intimacy with them.One of the keys of what makes somebody creepy is very simple: creepers assume a greater level of intimacy than actually exists.Something that I see a lot of people struggle with when and how it’s appropriate to approach and hit on women.

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