My christian daughter is dating a muslim
My christian daughter is dating a muslim - san diego cougar dating
(I was 21 years old.) The real tut-tutting was directed at the fact that I had been “allowed” to leave without a husband to look after me and keep me “pure.”I was a rebel to be sure — and a budding feminist to boot — but did not want to stray off the expected path too far.
A Christian father has been accused of murdering his teenage daughter by stabbing her repeatedly in the neck in a row over her Muslim boyfriend.
Even in the era of Trump, none of the white people we know who voted for him would admit to being racist.
None of our Pakistani or Indian friends voted for him — that we know of — and among these desi friends and acquaintances we hear only horror and anguish expressed at the rampant racism and xenophobia the Trump presidency has unleashed, not least against brown Muslims like ourselves.
Perhaps it was that disapproving vibe he got from me that day, perhaps it was his own need to grapple with what a relationship with a woman outside of his own race would mean for him in the future, perhaps my own daughter had feelings of insecurity and a need to please me, to “belong” to the Pakistani side of her heritage.
Perhaps it was all of the above that led to their splitting up soon after they both returned to New York after graduation. Fawzia Afzal-Khan is a University Distinguished Scholar and Professor of English at Montclair State University where she served as Director of Women’s and Gender Studies for many years.
She has been a Visiting Professor at Harvard University, NYU Abu Dhabi, and Kinnaird College, Forman Christian College and Government College in Lahore, Pakistan.
Her many books focus on postcolonialism, Pakistani theatre and Muslim women.
However, what we fail to acknowledge is our own internalized racism against black people, a legacy of 200 years of British colonial rule over India, where to be fair of skin is the standard of beauty, where to date and perchance to marry a white person is acceptable to some degree, but not a black person.
When our daughter Faryal told my husband and me ten years ago during her sophomore year in college that she was dating an African American young man of Jamaican heritage from the Bronx, I remember thinking it was a bad idea, hoping this fascination would pass.
Then he paused, looked at me, and said “I bet you had that problem!
” Without thinking, I instinctively responded, “Actually, I didn’t, because my parents didn’t raise a whore.” I was raised in a devoutly Christian home in which provocative clothing and behavior was forbidden, and dating wasn’t even a consideration.
You may see reference to it in the comment section so I wanted to provide that context.